QUESTION:
I get that discipling relationships are important, but how do they actually work?
ANSWER(S):
— Join a church. Don't just attend. The Holy Spirit wants you to be actively involved in the life of the congregation (1 Cor. 12-14; 1 Peter 4:10-11).
— Arrive early at church gatherings and stay late.
— Practice hospitality with members of your church (with old and young, new members and founding members).
— Ask God for strategic friendships. Gospel-centered relationships are critically important.
— If possible, include a line-item in your family or pastoral budget for weekly time with fellow Christians. Discuss this matter with your spouse. If possible, provide such a budget line for your spouse as well.
— Schedule regular breakfasts, lunches, or some other culturally-acceptable social engagement with teachable individuals (of the same sex). Depending on the person, you may decide to meet once, indefinitely, or for a set number of times (say, five). If you and the individual share a pastime, look for ways to share that pastime together.
— Ask lots and lots of questions. Ask them about themselves. Ask them about their parents, spouse, children, testimony, job, walk with Christ, and so on. In asking questions, however, do so in a manner that’s appropriate for your cultural context (don’t scare them!). Try not and ask questions that require only a simple "yes" or "no" response. For example, rather than asking do you enjoy sports? Ask, "what do you enjoy to do when you have free time?"
Share about yourself. Honesty and transparency begets vulnerability and openness. See 2 Cor. 6:11-12
— Look for ways to have spiritual conversations. Maybe decide to read the Bible or some other Christian literature together. Every meeting does not need to be a Bible study. However, Christian fellowship is centered around Christ and the Word of God.
— Consider their physical or material needs. Would they benefit from your help or from the help of fellow church members.
— Pray together. Pray for them when you are apart.
— Depending on your home situation, invite the person to drop by your house or spend time with your family. Let them watch you live life. Informal is sometimes more valuable then formal.
ANSWER(S):
— Join a church. Don't just attend. The Holy Spirit wants you to be actively involved in the life of the congregation (1 Cor. 12-14; 1 Peter 4:10-11).
— Arrive early at church gatherings and stay late.
— Practice hospitality with members of your church (with old and young, new members and founding members).
— Ask God for strategic friendships. Gospel-centered relationships are critically important.
— If possible, include a line-item in your family or pastoral budget for weekly time with fellow Christians. Discuss this matter with your spouse. If possible, provide such a budget line for your spouse as well.
— Schedule regular breakfasts, lunches, or some other culturally-acceptable social engagement with teachable individuals (of the same sex). Depending on the person, you may decide to meet once, indefinitely, or for a set number of times (say, five). If you and the individual share a pastime, look for ways to share that pastime together.
— Ask lots and lots of questions. Ask them about themselves. Ask them about their parents, spouse, children, testimony, job, walk with Christ, and so on. In asking questions, however, do so in a manner that’s appropriate for your cultural context (don’t scare them!). Try not and ask questions that require only a simple "yes" or "no" response. For example, rather than asking do you enjoy sports? Ask, "what do you enjoy to do when you have free time?"
Share about yourself. Honesty and transparency begets vulnerability and openness. See 2 Cor. 6:11-12
— Look for ways to have spiritual conversations. Maybe decide to read the Bible or some other Christian literature together. Every meeting does not need to be a Bible study. However, Christian fellowship is centered around Christ and the Word of God.
— Consider their physical or material needs. Would they benefit from your help or from the help of fellow church members.
— Pray together. Pray for them when you are apart.
— Depending on your home situation, invite the person to drop by your house or spend time with your family. Let them watch you live life. Informal is sometimes more valuable then formal.
