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What would you do?
Scenario 1: Two women
ask to meet with you. They are legally married residents of your state. They want to meet with you because they would like to
start coming to church regularly. They
have been recently listening to your sermons online and like them a lot. They have two children, one in Grade 3 and
one in Grade 8. They each say that they
believe that Jesus Christ is their Lord and Savior. They wanted to meet to see if it would be OK
for them to start coming to church regularly, along with their children. They want their kids to be involved in the
children and youth ministries.
What do you do next? Why?
Here is what I think I would do:
1)
I would identify evidences of God’s common
grace. “It is wonderful that you
want your children to be a part of a Bible-teaching church. It’s obvious that you love them very much.”
2)
I would explain that our church family is always
encouraged when guests visit and explain that our ministry exists to share
the gospel of Jesus Christ with the local community. In other words, “You are welcome to come and
observe any of our services.”
3)
I would graciously explain our doctrinal
position concerning marriage and sexuality reasoning from the Scriptures
so they see this is what God’s Word teaches.
4)
If the Spirit provided an opportunity to do
so I would share the gospel. I know
some pastors would choose not to “turn away” or “offend” a potential “seeker.” However, in following the evangelistic
pattern of the Master one must preach the truth in love understanding that
tomorrow is not guaranteed to any one of us (James 4:13-15; Heb. 9:27). Jesus went for the jugular with the rich,
young ruler and with the immoral Samaritan woman. Having said that, He also demonstrated radical
love and compassion. In John 8 Jesus
provides the perfect example of grace (“let him who is without sin cast the
first stone”) and truth (“go and sin no more”).
As the Master evangelist Jesus has left us with the perfect example.
5)
At some point, I would talk about how the
meeting went with another pastor or lay leader.
A leadership team provides mutual encouragement and helpful insights
that in turn will help me be a better servant. The “leader among leaders” must
remain a lifelong learner.
Here is how Pastor Phil Johnson responded to the same scenario:
"I'd assure them
that they are welcome to attend our church and listen to the teaching, but they
would not qualify for membership and their participation in ministry and
activities would therefore be limited.
I'd carefully explain (giving a biblical rationale) that:
I'd carefully explain (giving a biblical rationale) that:
1) We regard their lifestyle as sinful;
2) We don't recognize
their "marriage" as a legitimate expression of what marriage is supposed
to portray;
3) We don't accept their profession of faith because of their
persistence in a soul-destroying sin;
4) that would mean that they would be
excluded from the Lord's table; and
5) If they persisted in publicly professing
to be Christians, then in obedience to 1 Cor. 5:11 we would be forced to ban
them from even attending our services. Understanding that is the position our
commitment to Scripture demands, if they still want to attend so that they can
be exposed to the teaching, they would be more than welcome to come. (see also Phil's article on same sex attraction and impure lust).
Here is how Pastor Sam Allberry responded to a similar set of questions in his book is God anti-Gay?
Here is how Pastor Sam Allberry responded to a similar set of questions in his book is God anti-Gay?
Allberry suggests not talking about the issue of homosexuality during this meeting. He writes, "But my initial concern is for them to know they are welcome and that we are glad to have them with us, and for them to come under the sound of the gospel through the church's regular ministry. Another way to put this is to say that I would rather start at the centre and work outwards, then start at the edge and work in." (p. 65; is God anti-gay?). In other words, Allberry counsels pastors to not discuss the issue or bring it up unless they directly ask you about it. "Sometimes there is the danger of Christians thinking that a gay couple needs to be confronted about their sexuality almost the moment they walk through the door; that this needs to be talked about immediately and the couple told what the Bible's teaching is on the whole issue. This is simply not the case" (p. 64).
What about you reader? What would you do next? Why?
